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Re: Un-UnBirthdays

Perhaps this is as good a time as any to clear up a bit of Lewis Carrol inspired nonsense. During a slightly difficult conversation with the infamous Humpty Dumpty, young Alice of Wonderland notoriety learned of the custom of UnBirthday presents given on that side of the Looking Glass, in this case, a cravat Mr. Dumpty received from the White King and Queen. The bulk of that conversation is quoted below.

Other than leap years, we all have 364 UnBirthdays, to be celebrated, (or not), as we wish, at least this side of the Looking Glass. Annually, one day actually IS the anniversary of our birth, and as such is NOT an UnBirthday, thus it is an Un-UnBirthday.

My wishing them a merry Un-UnBirthday has probably confounded people for years.

Mea Culpa.

Now all should be as clear as Oyster Soup.

Oh, and a Merry UnBirthday to most of you.


Humpty Dumpty

from – “Through the Looking-Glass”; Chapter VI – “Humpty Dumpty”

‘What a beautiful belt you’ve got on!’ Alice suddenly remarked.

(They had had quite enough of the subject of age, she thought: and if they really were to take turns in choosing subjects, it was her turn now.) ‘At least,’ she corrected herself on second thoughts, ‘a beautiful cravat, I should have said–no, a belt, I mean–I beg your pardon!’ she added in dismay, for Humpty Dumpty looked thoroughly offended, and she began to wish she hadn’t chosen that subject. ‘If I only knew,’ she thought to herself, ‘which was neck and which was waist!’

Evidently Humpty Dumpty was very angry, though he said nothing for a minute or two. When he DID speak again, it was in a deep growl.

‘It is a–MOST–PROVOKING–thing,’ he said at last, ‘when a person doesn’t know a cravat from a belt!’

‘I know it’s very ignorant of me,’ Alice said, in so humble a tone that Humpty Dumpty relented.

‘It’s a cravat, child, and a beautiful one, as you say. It’s a present from the White King and Queen. There now!’

‘Is it really?’ said Alice, quite pleased to find that she HAD chosen a good subject, after all.

‘They gave it me,’ Humpty Dumpty continued thoughtfully, as he crossed one knee over the other and clasped his hands round it, ‘they gave it me–for an un-birthday present.’

‘I beg your pardon?’ Alice said with a puzzled air.

‘I’m not offended,’ said Humpty Dumpty.

‘I mean, what IS an un-birthday present?’

‘A present given when it isn’t your birthday, of course.’

Alice considered a little. ‘I like birthday presents best,’ she said at last.

‘You don’t know what you’re talking about!’ cried Humpty Dumpty. ‘How many days are there in a year?’

‘Three hundred and sixty-five,’ said Alice.

‘And how many birthdays have you?’


‘And if you take one from three hundred and sixty-five, what remains?’

‘Three hundred and sixty-four, of course.’

Humpty Dumpty looked doubtful. ‘I’d rather see that done on paper,’ he said.

from The Gutenberg Project

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I’m getting set to do this year’s, (2010), Dewey’s Read-A-Thon. Thanks for the heads-up, Fiona–(see the link for one of Fiona’s Blogs in the ‘Blogroll’ box to the right).

This is not a post on the topic, (“La Trahison des Images”, René Magritte, eg. “Ceci n’est pas une pipe”)¹, but rather a notice of the post on this topic about to appear on the “Arts” pages of this ‘communicating device’, (I took an irrational dislike to the term, “blog” when first I heard it and haven’t warmed to it an iota, using it since, under silent protest, as a concession to bone idleness). That page being pages, picks, strings, snaps: critiques.

So, go…move along now, move along…I’m sure we’ll, (I’ll), need the space for something…eventually.

See you on the flip side,


¹ clever juxtaposition

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‘Mad as a Hatter’ – The History of a Simile – NYTimes.com

Published: March 5, 2010

Is the Hatter mad?

Hatter-Sir John Tenniel/Rischgitz-Getty Images,1865

Hatter-Sir John Tenniel/Rischgitz-Getty Images,1865

Since 1865, when “Alice in Wonderland” was published, readers have quoted and parsed his every utterance. He’s called simply the Hatter in “Alice” and Hatta in “Through the Looking-Glass,” but we know he’s mad; the Cheshire-Cat tells us so.

Like the Cowardly Lion, the Mad Hatter is such a familiar figure that we’ve felt free to use his name without gleaning what afflicts him. His image has remained vivid, from the first book illustrations by Sir John Tenniel to Johnny Depp’s fleshed-out version in the Tim Burton movie that opened Friday.

But what did Lewis Carroll, a lover of riddles, mean by “mad”? The phrase “he’s mad as a hatter” was colloquial in Britain before “Alice.” Inquiries “respecting this simile” had appeared in the journal Notes & Queries, and in 1863 an answer, of sorts, was published, though its author was “at a loss to understand why a hatter should be made the type of insanity rather than a tailor or a shoemaker.” Readers were referred to the French phrase “Il raisonne comme une huitre” (“He reasons like an oyster”), suggesting that the French word for oyster, when Anglicized, may “have given occasion to the English ‘hatter.’” Hmm.

In the book, Alice herself finds the Hatter “dreadfully” puzzling; his remark “seemed to her to have no sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English.”

Linguists and phraseologists have tried to pinpoint the simile’s origins. Eric Partridge, in his “Dictionary of Slang and Unconventional English,” concluded that Carroll “definitely fixed the English sense” of the phrase as “extremely eccentric.” (Mr. Partridge also dismissed “mad” for “angry” as an American notion, though, he said, hatter/attercop, or spider, “has some support in ‘mad as a bed-bug.’”)

Since Carroll was well known as a mathematician, logicians have looked to his writing and discovered a sympathetic mind under the Hatter hat: perhaps a Mad Adder.

Physicists have used Hatterian concepts, often citing this quotation: “‘If you knew Time as well as I do,’ said the Hatter, ‘you wouldn’t talk about wasting it. It’s him.’” The physicist Robert A. Millikan was quoted in 1932 as saying that the Hatter was not mad “when he gave to Time changeable, undependable, capricious qualities which we assign to personality,” and furthermore, “who is the nearer right — the Mad Hatter or the common-sense citizen?”

The Hatter is focused on time, understandably, since the Queen of Hearts has accused him of being a time-murderer. This has added heft to the theory that a top-hat wearing inventor, Theophilus Carter, was the inspiration. Mr. Carter had displayed his Alarm-Clock-Bed — which was supposed to tip the sleeper out at the correct time — at the Great Exhibition in Hyde Park in 1851.

Next we come to the notorious “hatters’ shakes,” a result of poisoning from mercury used in the early days of hat manufacturing. At a recent news conference, Johnny Depp suggested that that was where “mad as a Hatter” came from. The Hatter is “this guy who literally is damaged goods,” he said. In the British Medical Journal in 1983, however, H.A. Waldron concluded that the Hatter did not have mercury poisoning. The principal psychotic features of this type of poisoning are “excessive timidity, diffidence, increasing shyness, loss of self confidence, anxiety and a desire to remain unobserved and unobtrusive.” The Hatter, he states, was “an eccentric extravert.”

All of this fits the spirit of illogicism in “Alice.” In response to one textual query, Carroll answered: “I’m very much afraid I didn’t mean anything but nonsense! Still, you know, words mean more than we mean to express when we use them.”

He would have liked the Unreasoning Oyster.

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Attention–to whom it may concern:

February 7th to 13th is officially FREELANCE WRITER APPRECIATION WEEK! Honest! So why don’t you visit your friendly neighbourhood writer and buy them a cuppa*, sharpen some pencils, trim a quill, or tidy up the piles of crumpled paper, pizza crusts, worn out keyboards, Red Bull tins and gnawed desktop surrounding them, or even give them a hug, (but approach carefully–if more four letter words are being mumbled or screamed than are being entered into the manuscript, frenzied attacks and/or uncontrollable sobbing may occur). Perhaps it’s best if you appreciate them from outside leaping range, but please do something.

Staring at a blank recording surface, equally blankly, wondering why every muse and inspiration took this particular time to vacation in the Bahamas, can be a lonely, frustrating experience, and we tend to forget food, sleep, phones, Facebook and most everything else other than wondering when it will stop, and a touch of the milk of human kindness can be very soothing, especially in the cuppa.  Or when the words are flowing and the pages are piling up, writing can be everything up to and including transcendent as we are ‘in the zone’ and we tend to forget food, sleep, phones, Facebook and most everything else other than wondering when it will stop. I, for one, (or occasionally several), promise not to growl–well–for this week, too much, anyway.

As a freelance writer, I shall appreciate your appreciation.

Now I have another two deadlines, past and passing, respectively, to which I should return. Another about which I’m currently playing “Phone Hide & Seek,” (a variation of “Phone Tag”), with a charming editor, (as Douglas Adams once said, “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.“), and I promise to appear delightfully surprized at any appreciation I receive this annual Freelance Writer Appreciation Week. Unless, I suppose, I am actually surprized, (startled) by the attention, at which time I am not accountable for and apologize in advance at any injuries, physical, emotional or psychological incurred by anyone present, nor for my complete lack of recognition, acknowledgment, response and/or rejoinder.

Enjoy the week,
and I’m sure your day is coming.
As ever,

Dr. H. Doc (Cheshire Hobbes) Burns, MA, MFA, Ph.D, Writer (Freelance)

* Caution: upon ascertaining the current mental state of the writer dictates what liquid the cuppa should contain. This can be another incendiary moment. If a cup containing the wrong percentage of alcohol and/or caffeine appear, the ‘appreciator’ should be ready if flying crockery occurs.  -d-

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Requiescat In Pace Sir Johnny

allmusic News Roundup: 2/08/2010
February 8th, 2010 | AMG Staff

R.I.P. “The First Knight of British Jazz,” saxophonist/clarinetist/arranger John Dankworth, who died on Saturday at age 82. Dankworth studied at the Royal Academy of Music in the ’40s and formed his first band, the Johnny Dankworth Seven, in 1950. Later that decade, Dankworth formed a big band and married jazz singer Cleo Laine. Along with UK chart success with 1956’s “Experiments with Mice” and 1961’s “African Waltz,” Dankworth moved into film work in the ’60s and became Laine’s musical director in the ’70s; during his career, he also worked as musical director for Ella Fitzgerald, Oscar Peterson, and Nat King Cole. Dankworth was knighted in 2006; he and Laine had a son and a daughter, both jazz musicians as well.

John Mayer, Arcade Fire and Haiti

allmusic News Roundup: 2/04/2010
February 4th, 2010 | AMG Staff

John Mayer and Arcade Fire have licensed two of their best-known songs to help with Haiti relief efforts. Along with donating $500,000, Mayer will contribute his 2006 hit “The Heart of Life” to Red Cross radio and television commercials. Meanwhile, Arcade Fire’s “Wake Up” will be used in charity ads that will run during the Super Bowl; all of their licensing fees will go to Partners in Health’s Stand with Haiti.

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“Real education must ultimately be limited to men who insist on knowing–the rest is mere sheep-herding.”

Ezra Loomis Pound

Ezra Pound (1885-1972) was born in Hailey, Idaho, grew up near Philadelphia, but lived much of his adult life overseas. In his early career he was the influential and a controversial leader of Imagism and Vorticism. He also championed young writers, including H.D., T.S. Eliot, and Robert Frost. Among his best-known works are “In a Station of the Metro,” “Hugh Selwyn Mauberley,” and The Cantos, a ranging, lifelong work that expounded his political and economic theories.

Possibly There Are Things to Come...
A Taste of Pound

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