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Re: Un-UnBirthdays

Perhaps this is as good a time as any to clear up a bit of Lewis Carrol inspired nonsense. During a slightly difficult conversation with the infamous Humpty Dumpty, young Alice of Wonderland notoriety learned of the custom of UnBirthday presents given on that side of the Looking Glass, in this case, a cravat Mr. Dumpty received from the White King and Queen. The bulk of that conversation is quoted below.

Other than leap years, we all have 364 UnBirthdays, to be celebrated, (or not), as we wish, at least this side of the Looking Glass. Annually, one day actually IS the anniversary of our birth, and as such is NOT an UnBirthday, thus it is an Un-UnBirthday.

My wishing them a merry Un-UnBirthday has probably confounded people for years.

Mea Culpa.

Now all should be as clear as Oyster Soup.

Oh, and a Merry UnBirthday to most of you.

–doc–

Humpty Dumpty

from – “Through the Looking-Glass”; Chapter VI – “Humpty Dumpty”

‘What a beautiful belt you’ve got on!’ Alice suddenly remarked.

(They had had quite enough of the subject of age, she thought: and if they really were to take turns in choosing subjects, it was her turn now.) ‘At least,’ she corrected herself on second thoughts, ‘a beautiful cravat, I should have said–no, a belt, I mean–I beg your pardon!’ she added in dismay, for Humpty Dumpty looked thoroughly offended, and she began to wish she hadn’t chosen that subject. ‘If I only knew,’ she thought to herself, ‘which was neck and which was waist!’

Evidently Humpty Dumpty was very angry, though he said nothing for a minute or two. When he DID speak again, it was in a deep growl.

‘It is a–MOST–PROVOKING–thing,’ he said at last, ‘when a person doesn’t know a cravat from a belt!’

‘I know it’s very ignorant of me,’ Alice said, in so humble a tone that Humpty Dumpty relented.

‘It’s a cravat, child, and a beautiful one, as you say. It’s a present from the White King and Queen. There now!’

‘Is it really?’ said Alice, quite pleased to find that she HAD chosen a good subject, after all.

‘They gave it me,’ Humpty Dumpty continued thoughtfully, as he crossed one knee over the other and clasped his hands round it, ‘they gave it me–for an un-birthday present.’

‘I beg your pardon?’ Alice said with a puzzled air.

‘I’m not offended,’ said Humpty Dumpty.

‘I mean, what IS an un-birthday present?’

‘A present given when it isn’t your birthday, of course.’

Alice considered a little. ‘I like birthday presents best,’ she said at last.

‘You don’t know what you’re talking about!’ cried Humpty Dumpty. ‘How many days are there in a year?’

‘Three hundred and sixty-five,’ said Alice.

‘And how many birthdays have you?’

‘One.’

‘And if you take one from three hundred and sixty-five, what remains?’

‘Three hundred and sixty-four, of course.’

Humpty Dumpty looked doubtful. ‘I’d rather see that done on paper,’ he said.

from The Gutenberg Project

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